Feelin’ Good: How to tell if your porn is positive

I was having dinner with a coworker from my vanilla job recently. He knows about the work that I do at Cherrystems and Ciné Sinclaire and, after just enough liquid courage, he had a question for me.

“So what you do, you make porn with people and you say you make sure they’re safe?” he asked, eyes darting around a little bit.

“Yeah, that’s the main goal of the sets that I run – that everyone is respected and feels safe coming forward with any concerns.”

“Well. For someone like me, how do I tell if the porn I’m watching is porn like that? How do I know if it’s something that was a good experience for the people in it?”

 

This is a conversation I’ve had before. I’ve been asked it by journalists, friends, fans, and coworkers alike. People are starting to show concern that perhaps the films they’re using to get off might be from sources that are a little bit less than positive. I feel like this is mostly due to documentaries like Netflix’s Hot Girls Wanted (which encourages a kind of shitty saviour/rescue complex), but either way it seems there’s a bit of an awakening happening in which sex workers are *starting* to be recognized as human beings worthy of respect (!!!!YAAAAY!!!!). … … (very tentatively). That said, I live in Canada and realize that things here may be very different than other Western countries with even stricter laws.

I want to be clear as I start writing this that there are plenty of folks that make porn for companies that have done exploitative things to some performers but they themselves had a great time there. There’s always nuance, and that’s important.

So here’s the thing: the society we live in has taught us not to think about where things come from. Our clothing, cars, food, it’s all just supposed to have magically appeared on the shelves and racks of the shops we frequent. But it doesn’t. Most of the possessions that we in the Western world tend to have were made in countries where working standards and minimum wages are well below the standard where we live. Work conditions can range from good to absolutely abhorrent. The huge fire in a factory in Bangladesh in 2012 did make some folks take pause, but apparently only for a moment.

In the US (as of 2012), only about 2% of the clothing that is purchased was actually made there – compared with 95% in 1960. A lot of factors played into this – globalization, demand for less expensive items, higher levels of consumerism, and more. The effects are generally that we have lost touch with where the things that we consume actually come from.

american-flag-made-in-china

So what does porn have to do with clothing? It’s the same concept. I asked my coworker if he knew where his clothes came from. He said “Old Navy”.

“Yeah, but where? Like, in the world? Do you know the labour laws in that country?” I asked, leaning forward a bit more. He did not know the answer to any of those questions. I explained where my outfit had come from (romper from atelier b Montreal, shrug from moovment Montreal, bag from Barbara and Cecile Winnipeg, etc). He looked stunned. Why? Because knowing where your shit comes from (and even the people that make it) is not common anymore.

With the advent of the internet, porn is a globally shared phenomenon just like clothing. Unfortunately, just like clothing again, we can’t always verify where it came from and what the working conditions were like on site. No matter where it was made geographically, it’s hard to tell. Typically, folks are getting their porn for free from a tube site or pornhub, with little to no information on where the porn originated, who made it, who is in it, and under what circumstances it was made. Finding this out is not easy.

I’m going to provide you with a list of a few things that you can do to ensure that the porn that you watch would make you feel as good to be on set for as it would to watch in the comfort of your bedroom (or kitchen or whatever). There are of course ALWAYS exceptions, and using your critical consumer brain and these tips, you might end up watching something that makes you feel even sexier than you ever have. Because happy performers = happy life.

1. Get to know your production companies

So ya know those little screens and logos you see at the start or end of a porn flick? Mine looks a little something like this:

cine sinclaire production snap.png

Those are your production companies.

It’s easy enough to google things in this day and age, so do just that. Googling the production company is going to have a few possible outcomes for you.

You might find nothing at all for that company. No casting calls, no production company site, no location, nothing. I’d warn that in general, production companies with no online record are ones you might want to avoid a bit, or at least be weary of. I understand that there are likely some smaller production companies that don’t have a huge web presence, but sites like twitter and tumblr are free to set up and use, and allow adult content on them. There are ways to get your business name out there, and so if it’s not out there, this may be a fly-by-night operation. The trouble that lies therein is really that if this company is hard to track down, they might not *want* to be tracked down, for any number of reasons. They may also be a smaller production group under a larger umbrella but using that separate name to distance themselves from issues with the larger company.

You might find lots about the production company you’re googling! Great! Look for what people are saying about this production company. Are there any warnings on message boards about how they treat their performers? Does the company have a mission statement that aligns with your values? Do they have one at all? Even an “about us” section? Does that sort of thing matter to you? Should it? Didn’t you ask me this question in the first place? Ok.

You can tell a lot from a production company just from a little google search. You’d be surprised.

You can also then have a look at the other titles released by the company. Reflect on the collection a bit (while breathing heavily, maybe). If having a diverse cast matters to you – does the company work toward that? Are the titles exploitative (more on that later)? These are all things you can look for.

2. Know your performers (a little)

Some performers are just starting out in the world; some only make one foray into porn; and some have shot hundreds of scenes, operating their own personal site, production company, twitter, tumblr, facebook, and even a LinkedIn account. Basically, some performers are going to be easier to track down than others. Just because you can’t find a performer online doesn’t mean you should raise a red flag, at all.

However, if the performer you’re into has their own twitter, tumblr, blog, or anything like that, try following it and reading what they have to say. They might tweet out that they had an amazing time working with a certain company, or the opposite – that working with one was terrible. A note on this would be that performers often do feel a pressure not to publicly say negative things about working with certain production companies or directors. The whole idea here is that if they say anything bad, they won’t be cast again. Unfortunately, this can be true to certain extents in some circles of porn-making. So how can you counteract that issue?

The short answer is that you can’t. The long answer is that, by getting to know performers online, you’ll come to know when they’re genuinely happy about a certain scene. Follow some neat people like Jiz Lee, Andre Shakti, Wolf Hudson, Mickey Mod, James Darling,  Chelsea Poe, and more! See who they work with, who they’re retweeting, and start to kinda get acquainted with who’s on twitter. It’s a relatively safe space for us porn folk to hang out, unlike Facebook.

3. Look at the language used in titles and marketing

Straight up here, some companies use slurs in their marketing. Slurs that specifically target LGBTQ people and people of colour. Generally speaking, these slurs are pretty not ok. I’m not going to mention them here because that’s not ok. If a company is using these sorts of words, they may have cleared it with the performer first, but they may not have.

For example, if you’re looking for porn with trans women in it, look for the term “trans women”. If a company isn’t marketing their trans porn in a way that respects those women, then that’s not a great jumping off point to trust that everyone was respected at other points along the way.

rmsnqcf

*There are some folks that are ok with using those slurs in a sexual play type of way. I’ll add that as our bit of nuance to this bullet point, but keep in mind that you should *really* know that the performer(s) in question were ok with using the word. Maybe they did an interview (like kink.com does) to explain the reasons behind it. But yeah. That’s the kind of thing that needs some ‘splaining.

4. Find a company/performer you trust and pay for their porn

giphy

Oh that sweet sweet green. Yeah, we don’t make much of it down here in the queer/feminist porn sphere. For many of us, the whole love of doing/making porn is to make a statement about our world, our sexuality, and ourselves. But another great motivating factor is getting *paid* to do that. In a world full of free porn, sites that treat their performers respectfully need your cash more than ever.

And if you pay for that sweet sweet porn, you’ll support the making of even more sweet sweet porn! That you can trust! And feel even better about it than you normally would watching porn (which is to say, SO GOOD!).

If you insist on pirating porn that was made positively, you’re stealing the hard work of people that have spent their time, money, and energy to make something really amazing and intimate. And they won’t be able to afford to make more, so it’s back to the status quo. And that would suck.

Plenty of mainstream porn is also made ethically, and they could use your cash too. Just pay for your porn, ok? It’s work.

5. When all else fails, here’s a list!

Ms. Naughty maintains a pretty good list of directors.

Pink Label sells amazing smut from tons of production companies/directors.

Lust Cinema is fantastic.

Ciné Sinclaire and Cherrystems are pretty lovely. (that’s me!)

Another great Canadian, Jessie Anderson, that makes accessible, free queer porn.

Indie Porn Revolution has featured so many amazing people (I’m on there too!)

Spit – some pals from Toronto

And so much more.

Happy jerking off time!

Kate

 

**plenty of folks make porn for sites and companies that might host a lot of questionable stuff, but their work can still be awesome. There are exceptions to the rules. I’ve made sure to attach some free porn to the suggestion list because shit ain’t revolutionary if it isn’t accessible to all**

**If I’ve misrepresented anyone or anything, please do comment so that I can learn and be accountable.

Warning to Performers/Sex workers in New York

OFFICIAL STATEMENT

Cherrystems.com and Cinesinclaire.com have been the victim of an impersonation scam that is at least active in New York, and could be active elsewhere. There is a man posing as a casting director or recruiter for our websites in order to lure sex workers to his home in rural NY. We are not and have never been affiliated with this person.

If you receive a text or email out of the blue asking you to perform with Ciné Sinclaire or Cherrystems, it is likely a scam. We do not typically make first contact with performers and models. Instead, we post casting calls directly on mskatesinclaire.com – Kate Sinclaire’s professional blog. If you are chosen as a performer for one of these calls, you will only be corresponding with someone with an @cherrystems.com or @cinesinclaire.com email address. No gmail! No hotmail! Nothing else!

The laws in America are sadly not in the favour of sex workers, but if you have been a victim of this scam or have been contacted by this man, please fill out our contact form asap to give us a heads up. A similar case to this was recently brought to court and the impersonator was convicted of rape in the second degree for his lies. If we are contacted by enough people, we can look into this.

Remember, only communicate with people with OFFICIAL email addresses when working out a gig with a reputable porn company. Reach out to people that have worked with the company before, reach out to the owners of the companies if you have to/can, and keep yourself safe!

Thank you so much for reading and spreading this information.

Kate Sinclaire
Owner
cherrystems.com
cinesinclaire.com

The Making of: Femmes

I’d worked with Samantha Leigh twice before. Once, she met me in a hotel room and we snapped pictures and chatted and got closer and it was wonderful. I’d known her from various bits of my life – mainly from a conference she runs in Toronto. The second time, we shot some adorable photos in her bedroom while I was out in the Tdot meeting with a few fun toy companies.

But she decided that it was time to maybe move beyond just still photos, into the fancy future of moving pictures. There was a lot of talk around doing it, about insecurities, about body love, and about who to shoot with.

I made up a casting call for Samantha, but ultimately we decided that the best and most comfortable way to ease into the porn world would be to shoot with someone she knows and loves, Jessica Sinclaire (we share no relation, though I insist we’re long-lost porno sisters). We brought Jessica on board, set up a date, and I rented an Airbnb. I was coming out anyway for the Feminist Porn Awards, and getting shooting done around that time of year is one of my favourite things. There’s an energy there. Everyone’s excited – more excited than usual.

Jessica and Samantha arrived in the late morning to my (rented) condo. We chatted, snacked on hummus and carrots and crackers, berries, and an assortment of other goodies. It was then that the bags of accoutrements the two had brought along got dumped out on the floor and we began to plan the shoot for the day.

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It’s like candy.

The femmyness of this pile of pleasure was fantastic. The pearl-encrusted hitachi magic wand was a craft project. The candy pink cuffs and collar. Heels. Bras. Underpants (I’m sorry, I’m just incapable of saying panties and taking it seriously). Everything was lace and pearls and pink and fucking perfect.

We added a few toys to the pile from the Fuze lineup, including the Tango specifically, at which point I take over the conversation and bring in the legal bits and whatnot. By that, I mean all performers sign a 2257 (proof of age) form, a Ciné Sinclaire performance agreement, and I have to witness a conversation about STI status and barriers. I basically ask each performer to disclose their status to their partner with me present, and then to talk about which barriers they would like to use (if any), and ways to check in throughout the shoot to see if things have changed. It’s quite wholesome and lovely.

With all of that out of the way, Jessica and Samantha got themselves dressed and ready. As producer/director of a tiny company, I also do things like straighten straps, apply makeup, refresh water in glasses, and ensure that everyone feels comfortable. My assistant that day, Dayna Danger, also helps out with all of these things. It’s a little family, and I love it.

We’d discussed that the scene would start very casually. It’s my favourite way to shoot, honestly. We’d just start hanging out in the bedroom while Dayna and I synced up our camera settings, and then we’d just kind of start rolling. This is pretty much exactly what we ended up doing on this shoot. I love it because it means that the performers are more at ease – there’s no hard and fast “ACTION” moment, and I get a lot of really great B-roll of the performers just being themselves. I feel like it’s the kindest way to start shooting a scene like this one (that has no scripted dialogue).

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Testing the settings on my camera, but also catching amazing moments.

This was a very free form shoot. That presents so many challenges and also allows for so much creative freedom. Basically, myself and Dayna work hard to be flies on the wall as much as possible during a free form shoot. We just let the action unfold in front of us. And so we did.

Samantha and Jessica were amazing to shoot. It was so perfect to watch both of them giving each other so much pleasure. But the part that really sticks out to me is the moment that Jessica asks if she can squirt all over the bed (it’s the bed I was sleeping in while out in toronto). Of course the answer was a resounding yes, and there’s a bit of behind the scenes footage to show the moment where we cut for a bit in order to hide a towel underneath the duvet. With the towel in place, we pick back up and keep rolling.

Moments later, I notice myself biting my finger behind my camera as the scene intensifies, Jessica’s legs curl up and back, and she gets ever closer to the edge. It’s in that instant that my camera barks a command at me from the screen: “CARD FULL”

Oh god.

“STOP! Shit!” I yell.

Jessica has probably rarely looked at someone with such a look of fear and confusion as I tear off to grab a backup card I have on a dresser a mere 7 feet away from me. Yet my trip there and back, flinging the old card out and the new one in, seemed like it took a year.

Thankfully, Dayna kept rolling, and as soon as I got back to my spot and motioned that I was good, it happened. The Money Shot. Through the magic of editing, none of you will even know the moment. But know, in the back of your head, that it happened.

Watching these two have sex was epic, intimate, and glorious. I truly feel that this hour-long feature captured the essence of the fun that these two have together. I’m so incredibly happy that I get to share it with you.

Check out the trailer and rent/buy the film here on Ciné Sinclaire. 

See you soon, porno connoisseur!

❤ Kate

 

photo-1432139523732-e9d8af332501

Porn in Public?!: Notes on attending porn screenings

So it finally happened. You got an invite to a film screening – but this one is different. It’s for *adult videos* (read: porn).

Instantly, your mind may be filled with the seedy adult film houses of the past. Dank theatres with sticky floors and tissues scattered about. A wash of shame might come over you as you realize that other people might see you go to this thing.

But. You really want to go.

I’m not saying that porn theatres don’t still exist. They do, in pockets, here and there. But largely, the porn that we consume today is consumed in private. Away from the eyes of strangers. The advent of the home VCR really brought this about. Before they were common, folks had to go out of the house to see their adult films. The Golden Age of Porn began in approximately 1969, with huge directors like Andy Warhol having their explicit works screened in theatres. The film Deep Throat pulled in 600 million dollars at the box office!  These were not small productions, and many many folks went to see them at local theatres. Unfortunately, laws in the US changed in 1973 after a short-lived Golden Age, and obscenity legislation dictated that pornographic films could no longer be played in mainstream movie houses – relegating the films to the above-mentioned seedy theatres. This created a needless stigma on seeing porn in public that has really stuck with North Americans for more than a generation at this point.

Porn is now, however, experiencing another renaissance of sorts. With smaller production companies producing porn that is feminist, queer, ethical, etc, we’re seeing more and more art house porn screenings. Trouble is, with this long of a gap between 1973 and 2016, how are we supposed to know how to act when seeing pornographic films in public?

To help you out, here are 4 things to do/expect when you go to a porn screening near you:

  1. What am I getting myself into?
    You’re going to watch movies with a big group of people, and those films are going to have some adult content in them. The group putting on the screening will generally give you an idea of what to expect, trigger/content warnings if applicable (this means that if there are events that happen in the films that might trigger someone in a PTSD type reaction, organizers will generally post what those triggers might be. ie: fantasies of non-consent, restraint, etc).

    There is no contract to enter into when you walk in the door. You are free to leave at any time if you feel uncomfortable, and organizers generally make sure to say this at the beginning of the event.

    All that said, watching porn in public isn’t all silence and heavy breathing. The first event that I attended was a screening for the Feminist Porn Awards in Toronto. I really had no idea what to expect – and it turned out to run the entire gamut of emotions. There were moments when the crowd would burst into laughter, fits of giggles, or gasps. There were moments when the entire crowd fell silent and few folks dared to breathe. There were sweet smiles, bitten lips, and hands grasped. Everything.

    It really is an amazing experience to be immersed in a crowd of people doing something that is normally such a private thing. It brings out the honesty of the whole thing. A porn film can be appreciated just as a film – with the ability to evoke emotion and spark conversation.

    So really, expect to watch some films! But do be prepared to experience the energy of an entire crowd of people just kind of letting go!

  2. What do I wear?!
    Ah, the age old question of what to wear. In my personal life, I tend toward cute dresses, black tights, and a standard pair of little booties or flats. Hardly kinky, hardly edgy, hardly anything I would have considered sexy. When I started attending porn screenings, I thought I really had to look the part. I put on a tight dress and some heels and wiggled my way to the screening.

    Surprisingly, even some directors that were in attendance were wearing my usual uniform. Some were even wearing jeans! JEANS! And a tshirt! Maybe with a scarf!

    Since going to public porn events, I’ve learned that it’s a very come-as-you-want situation. Some folks like to get dressed up, and some people just don’t. And all of those are fine. Nowadays, I own exactly one faux leather dress for times that I am attending specific kink events, but otherwise, this is how I go to screenings/the grocery store now: 12348014_942934639119821_7408034664679722403_n

    All that said, no two porn screenings are going to be exactly alike. Check into the event to see if there is a dress code.

  3. Am I expected to get touchy? What are the rules around this?
    In general, these are not sex parties unless explicitly described as such. Many of these events take place in regularly licensed bars, theatres, or art galleries. There are a lot of folks in the same space, and generally respecting their boundaries and the situation they agreed to get into is awesome.

    I’ve definitely held people’s hands at screenings. Sometimes it’s because they’re getting all hot and bothered, sometimes it’s because something has triggered them, sometimes they just want to feel connected in this vulnerable situation. But I’ve also sat alone and chilled out.

    As always, consent is huge in this setting. Don’t reach out and grab someone’s hand without asking, ya know? And if someone is getting too touchy near you and you feel violated, well-organized events will back you up in getting those folks to tone it down.

  4. I’m really just in this for the films, how do I make myself feel comfortable?
    So you’re here because your friend made some films and you really want to support them. That’s awesome. Here’s how to make yourself feel comfortable.

    Go, and have fun. Leave your expectations at the door, and maybe you’ll find something that you didn’t know you liked! It’s really that simple. Remember that you can leave anytime, and everything will be alllllllright.

Let’s get Productive: 4 tips to get to it and get shit done

This is a post in my dildoholiday series. If you’d like to read the whole shebang of what happened while we were out there, you should totally start out here.

Moving right along.

Day 2 in the #dildoholiday household started at a reasonably late hour, with a few cautious tweets from a couple of us around noon. As we stumbled about in our sleepy bodies, we found the Cherub of Shame juding our food choices from inside the refrigerator. Jerk.

Photo by Girly Juice

Photo by Girly Juice

The day had one main topic to be touched on at some point: productivity. Trouble was, we’d all stayed up so late being excited and settling in to the house that we’d all barely slept. I’ll touch on why that’s shitty for productivity later, but I imagine you can draw a correlation in your own life beteween those nights that we get 4 hours of sleep and the amount of work you (don’t) get done the next day.

We all eventually gathered around the big kitchen table with our laptops and ideas, and Girly Juice led us in a chat about productivity. Her output is amazing, and we all particularly adore her for it. Her dedication to a regular release schedule, and the amazing content that she throws out shows that not only does she write a lot, but that she does work to make that writing turn out so well.

Look 'ma, we got off the couch!

Look ‘ma, we got off the couch! photo by Reenie

So, without further ado, here’s Kate’s tips for productivity, inspired by #dildoholiday and Girly Juice:

1) Make more effective lists

I live by lists. I can’t concentrate on any one thing for longer than half an hour generally, and so I really need to write down all the shit that I need to get done in a day or none of it will happen.

I also know how I handle stress, and how I let myself get defeated by tasks. For example, if I have the list item “Clean your office”, I might start that task but will quickly get distracted and move on to some other thing that is either on my list or just something shiny nearby that catches my attention. At the end of the day, my office still looks like shit and my list has just as many things on it as it did before, since I didn’t really finish cleaning my office.

So instead, here’s an example of my lists:

-Pick up papers off bed and sort them
-wrangle sex toys
-dust desk
-take out the garbage
-replace bag in the garbage bin

Can you see the difference there? I’ve made all kinds of little list items based around cleaning the office, but I get to check off way more shit way more quickly. It really helps me to manage larger tasks by listing the steps involved.

The exact same thing goes for work tasks. For example, I’m in the middle of planning an East Coast screening tour with a colleague on Evernote (which is great for coworking). Obviously the list could include something like “Get venue”, but there are so many steps hidden in that one step. The list, as it stands, for the venue in each city contains the following types of steps:

-research venues via locals
-find contact person
-email re regulations on screening nudity
-settle date
-book venue

Break it down into small, manageable tasks that you can check off easily and, more importantly, keep track of super easily.

2) Make yourself get out of your comfy spot

I never do anything but this in bed.

I never do anything but this in bed.

I have a super comfy spot on the couch in my living room, and also I have my bed. I’ve spent a long time perfecting both of these spaces so that everything around them calms me and makes me think gleefully of the past, present, and future. While that’s awesome, I often find myself just sitting there, thinking, for literally hours. I can’t be stopped.

I like to physically put myself in a space that is built for my productivity, or in a space that is quite simply not my fucking couch. While my couch is great, it lacks a place for me to put my mouse and use it in any useful capacity. Most of the work that I do require some serious mouse use, and I primarily work from a laptop since I travel so much.

All of that said, your space to work in should be comfy. My office in my house is a space that celebrates the accomplishments of my reasonably short time here on earth. I keep framed copies of newspaper articles about me, awards I’ve won, etc, all around just to remind me to keep at it. But it’s a space that’s specifically meant for work. The couch was not meant for work, for me. If it was for you, then by all means work on the couch. But try to separate your comfy relaxing spaces from your work spaces, whatever they look like.

3) Get fancy

Here I am, getting fancy for a day of productivity.

Here I am, getting fancy for a day of productivity.

This tip definitely won’t be the same for everyone, and I understand the classism inherent in getting fancy for business. But this element really works for me, so I’ll talk about what it means to me in the context of my own experiences.

I started to like “dressing up” around the age of 24. I had previously been a very jeans and a t-shirt kind of person, and didn’t really do the femme thing. I think I owned two pieces of what I’d call makeup, no nail polish, and maybe one dress. I also didn’t have much disposable income. But even back then, I remember that getting up, putting on whatever made me feel good, doing my hair (it was short, easy to do, but even just the act of *doing* it was important), and sitting down to work on whatever was in front of me really got me started.

Since then, I’ve amassed a lot of “fancier” items, but the ritual itself remains the same. Now it includes things like earrings and fancy nail polish (I cut the waiting time involved in this by using Julep’s Polymer Topcoat, which dries super fast). The trick is to get a bit fancy, feel good about yourself, but also not spend the entire morning/afternoon/whatever getting fancy. I try to limit myself to about 20 minutes, and I should also note that the idea of getting dressed is actually a thing that motivates me to finally get out of bed. Maybe this is a way that I can pitch to myself that buying all the clothes I buy is actually an investment in my business. Yeah.

For me, it’s a dress, earrings, brows, lipstick, putting my hair up, and a nice set of underpants. For you, it could be your best sweat pants and a top that makes you feel awesome about yourself. The idea of the whole thing is to make yourself feel really good about yourself before you start working. As a few #dildoholiday participants pointed out, feeling good about yourself can also mean feeling *super* comfy. Harness the power of clothing, however you like!

4) If you work from home, try leaving home every now and again

It's my laptop working on things from a college campus in Winnipeg.

It’s my laptop working on things from a college campus in Winnipeg.

This is more important than you’d think. Getting out of your space can stimulate creativity in ways you didn’t know it could. Being in a new environment kicks you out of your habits and into new ones.

I tend to either rent space at 245 McDermot, which is a coworking space in Winnipeg owned by ACI (Creative Manitoba) that rents hot desks for $30/day, go to an hOffice, or go to a local haunt that serves frosty beverages, since I don’t drink caffeine at all. I have a magical productivity spot that lives around 1.5 drinks and then sharply drops off, and so I do have to make sure that I pace myself with great discipline. I imagine this is the same for coffee drinkers. (and please don’t think this means you need to consume alcohol or caffeine or any other drug in order to be creative or to focus)

Stay tuned for the next episode of #dildohoilday on my blog, where we’ll talk about making our own glass dildos!!

And if you haven’t read part 1 of the #dildoholiday series, go read it right now!! 

Dildoholiday: 7 people and the sea.

And the sex.

Where do I begin?

#dildoholiday was a bunch of friends from the internet getting together in a beach house on the Oregon coast. We’re all internet personalities in some way, but we’re all definitely involved in sex blogging. Epiphora, Aerie, and BexTalksSex were the main organizers of the whole thing. The rest of us just came in from 5 other cities across the continent to join in the fun.

Flying into the Pacific Northwest always floats my boat.

Flying into the Pacific Northwest always floats my boat.

What I didn’t expect from Piph, Aerie and Bex was just how prepared they were for us, and all the amazing things that they had in store. They’d asked companies that they regularly work with if they could help make our vacation even more exciting, and ended up creating quite the experience for us.

I arrived in Portland in an airplane for the first time. Previously, I’d driven down from Vancouver (I’m a Canadian), but as such had never really experienced the glorious Portland airport. I, of course, took a snap of my shoes and the famous carpet, then got on my way to Piph’s house in a rented autocar.

Portland PDX carpet feet

The notorious carpet at PDX.

And then it was right in to the family. I was the last to arrive, which means I found everyone happily hanging out at Epiphora’s place. I met Girly Juice and Reenie for the first time, but I’d met Penny, Piph, Bex, and Aerie before. We all got settled in and gave each other some hello gifts. Maple candy and personalized drawings from Reenie, coasters with original photography from Penny, and I gave everyone a Naked on the Internet shirt from cherrystems.com (my soft porn company), perhaps in anticipation of seeing everyone naked that weekend!

Girly Juice models one of the Cherrystems shirts like a professional.

Girly Juice models one of the Cherrystems shirts like a professional. (photo links to her original tweet)

Starting off by playing a few rounds of Concept, then moving on to watching the classic film, 50 Shades of Grey. Most of us hadn’t seen it, but decided that in order to keep up with pop culture’s idea of BDSM, we should probably give it a go. We got about halfway through before we had to get on to the next thing of the night, but there will be more on this later.

Next up, we headed over to SheBop for a hello! I made sure to thank the staff for selling so much Fuze, and you should probably also go to their shop (or their website) to purchase some of our super awesome silicone toys. I did make a few purchases, which I’ll definitely note because I loved them so much. First was a card to be mailed off to my husband back in Winnipeg from Foulmouth Greetings. I absolutely love her cards, they’re just the most adorable. I definitely picked up the one with the house on it! I also finally picked up the 2014 copy of Smut Peddler, an amazing anthology of sexy graphic smut.

The last item I picked up was a bottle of Good Clean Fun lube. I’d actually never encountered it before, and bought it on the recommendation of Bex. I’ve only used it a few times now, but so far I’m really loving it. It has a tiny hint of vanilla, and is aloe based, which my crotch seems to absolutely love. I’ll keep using it a little more and report back on my experiences with it!

Following that, we headed over to Salt and Straw which, for those unaware, has amazing ice cream. I filled up a waffle cup with two flavours – Olive Oil, and Black Truffle. WHAT?! I’d had the olive oil ice cream before, and knew that it has a light, subdued fruity flavour with a texture like fucking butter, but I was trying the truffle for the first time. I was a bit concerned that it might taste mushroomy, but daaaamn! It was perfect and earthy.

Epiphora took this cute photo of me taking a photo of myself and my iced creeeam.

Epiphora took this cute photo of me taking a photo of myself and my iced creeeam.

The rest of the night was spent eating at food trucks, drinking cucumber lime soda, and then heading over to Devil’s Point – a strip club in Portland. Now, I’ve seen people take their clothes off in many a city. Toronto, Vancouver, Winnipeg, Montreal, New York, and more. This? This took the fucking cake. The dancers were amazing, approachable, and totally pros. Their floor work was just as impressive as their pole work (WHICH BLEW MY MIND), and I adored being there.

Well, you certainly can't take photos while you're in there.

Well, you certainly can’t take photos while you’re in there.

I did have to move to the back while Bex, Piph, and Penny got private dances – but I made use of it and got a few people to buy me tumblers full of whiskey.

I fucking love Portland.

The rest of the night saw Bex, Piph, Penny, and me catching up like the oldest of friends. We went to bed a little late, considering that we needed to be up early enough to get on our way to Lincoln City. Still, we managed to get out of bed and on our way on time.

This

This “Captain my Captain” donut actually made me shake from sugar overdose. It was horrifying (and tasty).

We hit Voodoo donut, payed a great visit to JoEllen, and got on the road at a reasonable hour. A quick grocery shopping trip (which was amazingly a treat of SheVibe!), a two hour drive, and a whole lot of French folk songs (ask Girly Juice and Reenie about this one) and we arrived at the house!

As soon as we arrived, we were in a bit of a rush to make it to the SUPER SECRET SURPRISE. Bex, Piph, and Aerie were all in on it, but Penny, Girly Juice, Reenie and I had no idea what was going on. I did have a moment of anxiety around this super secret surprise, as all we’d been told was to wear closed toe shoes, pants, no flowy clothing, and that it might make us sweat. Because, like many, this conjures up ideas of gym class, I got a little freaked out – I won’t lie. This was actually one of the first times I’ve been surprised in my life. I’m usually the planner of surprises, so who surprises the surpriser? Dildoholiday folks do! We hopped in our cars again for the quick ride to the surprise. As we turned corners, with Bex and Piph in my car, I saw us going toward the ocean. My mind automatically went to boats. “OH MY GOD ARE WE GOING ON BOATS?!” I asked. I was wrong, but definitely got laughed at for being so restless about the surprise. Two turns later, however, I saw a building with writing in the window. It said: Blow your own glass! HOLY SHIT WE ARE MAKING DILDOS AREN’T WE?!

pennysblog_20150604_16

Photo courtesy of Penny!

Yes, yes we were. (and on behalf of the good folks at WeVibe and Tantus, no less) Or, we thought we were. Bex had prearranged with the owners of the glass studio to have us come by at 6:30, when the shop was closed, so that we wouldn’t scare off the tourists. Sadly, Kelly, the person we’d coordinated with, spaced it and forgot that we were coming. We hung out for half an hour, then went to pick up some margarita supplies and headed back to the house where we ate food that we so badly needed. So ultimately, it was probably good that it didn’t work out that night. Luckily, we got a hold of Kelly the next day, and we rescheduled for 6 the next day.

We were all asked at that point to retire to our rooms to allow for the setting up of a surprise by Bex, Aerie, and Piph. There were doin’s a-happening. I used this time to move in to my room, on the same floor as Bex, Penny, and Girly Juice.

Moving in for me includes the Buckinator Glow, my journal, a paddle, lube, and earplugs. Because reasons.

Moving in for me includes the Buckinator Glow, my journal, a paddle, lube, and earplugs. Because reasons.

When we were called back up, we couldn’t believe our eyes! There was a bag of treats for each of us, chalk full of surprises hand picked for us. Bex, Piph, and Aerie worked really hard on all of it to make sure that we’d feel super special and welcome, and it worked! I’ll run through a list of some of the amazing bits we got, so you can be sure to support these lovely companies in the future.

So many great things! So many thanks!

So many great things! So many thanks!

With that all settled, we moved on to the next part of the evening: Popcorn, Pyjamas, and Porn. This was an evening of porn curated by yours truly (that’s me) for all of the #dildoholiday folks to watch and enjoy. I’ll post the list here because if you don’t know about any of the films, you really should:

It was amazing! I opened with Taken, which actually features essentially no pornographic video content. Instead, it’s like a spoken word erotica piece. And I love it, so so much. If you have a chance, you should check it out. I’m really into it for so many reasons. I won’t break down every other film though. I really think you should check all of them out (and pay for them too!).

Taken by Penny - Porn cuddles among internet friendsies.

Taken by Penny – Porn cuddles among internet friendsies.

But what I will talk about is the magic of watching porn in a group that is so sex positive. We cuddled and watched the scenes with colourful excitement, and really got to know a lot about each other. Popcorn came out, wine was poured, and we ended up staying up til far too late. It’s around this time that we made a new frienemy in the household – The Cherub of Shame.

There he sits, in his home.

There he sits, in his home. Photo by Aerie.

We found him perched above the windows to the sunroom as we were starting the porn night, and decided that he maybe shouldn’t be exposed to the sins we were about to unleash. I pulled him down and stowed him away. While we thought it was over, he was soon found peeping on us in the washroom by Epiphora. Shouts of discomfort rang from that loo as she pulled him out and commented on his presence. Suddenly, we noticed, he HAD A TWITTER ACCOUNT.

As the porn played on, we tried out toys – new or old to us. I spent some quality time next to Girly Juice on the couch, both of us fully clothed and trying out some vibes, having casual orgasms.

The sun started to rise as some folks paired off. I tiptoed my way gleefully to bed and couldn’t wait to find out what tomorrow would hold.. I MEAN, DILDOS GUYS!!

For more dildoholiday updates, keep up with me here on mskatesincliare.com! Next up: Productivity tips from #dildoholiday!

Casting call: Winnipeg, MB – Summer 2015

Preference will be given to folks of colour, but all are welcome to apply! Please self identify!

ALL PERFORMERS MUST BE OVER THE AGE OF 18 AND PROVIDE TWO PIECES OF ID TO PROVE THIS FACT.

CinéSinclaire.com, a soon-to-be launched Canadian feminist porn production company under the umbrella of Cherrystems Media is announcing a casting call for the Winnipeg area. Shoots will be approximately 2-3 hours in length, with a consent conversation beforehand and debrief afterward.

What we’re looking for:
Do you have a sexual story to share with the world? We’re presently casting performers for 15-30 minute clips to be used on CinéSinclaire.com. We’re looking for individuals that want to exhibit the ways that they have sex, be it vanilla, kinky, spiritual, masturbation, anything. The kind of sex you’re having is the kind of sex we’d love to put on film.

We are actively seeking anyone of any gender expression, orientation, shape, size, skin colour, ethnicity, and age (over 18), to create porn with us. We are ideally looking for couples or people that would like to work with another person that they are already familiar with, but will also look at full casting options.

To apply, complete the following:
Please send a brief but descriptive blurb about what you would like your scene to be, and why you feel this kind of sex should be on film, to kate@cherrystems.com. If you would like to include your ethnicity, gender, size, orientation, or otherwise, you are more than welcome to but are not required. All applications are confidential, and self-identifying is encouraged to help us represent the most folks possible. Also please add confirmation that you are 18 years of age or older to your email.

Let us know if you have a shooting partner (or partners) in mind. Please only suggest people that you have already approached. We will need to speak with this person before the shoot as well.

Please include one photo of yourself so that we know what you look like! We do not discriminate, this is purely to get to know you and your aesthetic.

Shoots will take place in the area of Winnipeg, MB, Canada this summer. Please advise if you’ll need an accessible space, and what you would require.

This is a paid shoot. Our reply email will contain details.

It’s June!

It’s June! And maybe you’ve noticed that Cine Sinclaire is not launched yet. I’m going to take a sec to let you know what’s going on.

Cine Sinclaire is run by a small group of folks –mainly myself and my husband, Aaron, who does the programming for the site. We’d been on track to launch in May, but Aaron got a new job pretty much on May first. The adjustment to the new position has taken a lot more of Aaron’s energy than anticipated. It’s a remote position, which means he’s been working from home – which is awesome! But without a laptop at his disposal, he’s basically been stuck in our basement for up to 12 hours a day, working on his job or on Cine Sinclaire.

Seeing that this was pretty shitty for his wellbeing, I decided I’d much rather delay the launch of the site. Our minds and lives are worth so much, and with my experience with anxiety in life, I don’t want to inflict that kind of work on anyone.

This is a decision that I do not regret in any way. I really do want the site to launch ASAP, and as soon as things have balanced out, we’re only about 2 weeks from launch. Ideally we’ll launch in June now that Aaron has a laptop and can work outside of the basement. Working on the front porch is certainly more refreshing than not seeing daylight, I’m sure you can understand that.

I’m so excited that you’re excited for the launch too! And I can’t wait to share all of this hard work with you!!

General Casting Call – Toronto April 14-17, 2015

We’ve had a cancellation! Preference will be given to folks of colour, but all are welcome to apply! Please self identify!

ALL PERFORMERS MUST BE OVER THE AGE OF 18 AND PROVIDE TWO PIECES OF ID TO PROVE THIS FACT.

CinéSinclaire.com, a soon-to-be launched Canadian feminist porn production company under the umbrella of Cherrystems Media is announcing a casting call for the Toronto area between November 6-10, 2014. Shoots will be approximately 2 hours in length, with a consent conversation beforehand and debrief afterward.

What we’re looking for:
Do you have a sexual story to share with the world? We’re presently casting performers for 15-30 minute clips to be used on CinéSinclaire.com. We’re looking for individuals that want to exhibit the ways that they have sex, be it vanilla, kinky, spiritual, masturbation, anything. The kind of sex you’re having is the kind of sex we’d love to put on film.

We are actively seeking anyone of any gender expression, orientation, shape, size, skin colour, ethnicity, and age (over 18), to create porn with us. We are ideally looking for couples or people that would like to work with another person that they are already familiar with, but will also look at full casting options.

To apply, complete the following:
Please send a brief but descriptive blurb about what you would like your scene to be, and why you feel this kind of sex should be on film, to kate@cherrystems.com. If you would like to include your ethnicity, gender, size, orientation, or otherwise, you are more than welcome to but are not required. Also please add confirmation that you are 18 years of age or older to your email.

Let us know if you have a shooting partner (or partners) in mind. Please only suggest people that you have already approached. We will need to speak with this person before the shoot as well.

Please include one photo of yourself so that we know what you look like! We do not discriminate, this is purely to get to know you and your aesthetic.

Shoots will take place in the area of downtown Toronto, ON, Canada at some point between April 14-17, 2015. Please advise if you’ll need an accessible space.

This is a paid shoot. Our reply email will contain details.

Ciné Sinclaire’s Curated Clip Store – Call for submissions!

Do you make porn? AWESOME! Are you Canadian? EVEN BETTER! Not Canadian? Read on, you may also fit in here.

CinéSinclaire.com is a porn site with emphasis on the experience of fucking/sex/intimacy. Performers guide shoots through their own boundaries, wants, desires, and consent. We are launching this Spring with a catalogue of our own films produced by Kate Sinclaire, and a clip store of content produced by others. We are intersectionally feminist, and prioritize the inclusion of groups of people that are traditionally underrepresented in porn, or that are traditionally not given space for their own narratives.

We will be implementing a curated clip store section of our site. We’re paying specific attention to Canadian producers, but are happy to view work from anywhere in the world! If you’d like to submit some of your own work to be hosted on our clip store, we need a few things from you:

-The file in final high res quality: 1080p is great, or whatever the largest file size you have is. Please send in MP4 (H.264+AAC) format.
-A 20-40 second trailer to promote the piece, again in the same formats above.
US 2257 forms for all performers featured in your work. This includes everyone that appears in the film, whether they are active participants or not.
This form, filled out, giving Cine Sinclaire permission to distribute your film, and stating that you have the rights to distribute the film. If you did not produce the film personally, you must obtain permission from the original producer. Cine Sinclaire and Cherrystems Media will not claim responsibility for distributing films that are not owned by the person that submits them, and legal action can be taken against the submitter if the rights do not belong to them, for misleading Ciné Sinclaire AND for violating copyright of the original producer.
-Send all information to kate@cherrystems.com, and send all files to the same dropbox. Not all films will be eligible for the clip store – we will select films based on quality. In doubt? Submit and see! Anything not accepted will be politely returned with encouragement to create more, and the work will not be featured in any way on Ciné Sinclaire.

Hooray! It’s that easy! Now, how does the payment work?

Payment will be distributed to the party that submits the film to Ciné Sinclaire when a certain profit level is reached. To begin, this pay out level will be in $50 increments or monthly (if film is making more than $50 profit per month, that month will be paid all at once. If it takes a film longer than a month to make $50 profit, pay will be sent out when the film makes $50) and will be online-based. Ciné Sinclaire will take a 40% cut of the sale of each film to cover bandwidth, maintenance, processing fees, and customer service. The remaining 60% will be given to the party that submits the film. A minimum price will be suggested based on length of the film, but producers are free to otherwise name their own price for their work.

Can I have my own store?

This option is coming down the road, but for now, users will indeed be able to search the Ciné Sinclaire clip store by production company/producer, as well as by performer and various tags! You can host all your own work in one spot without worrying about all the time and cost of building a website! Yay!

When does it launch?

We’re just finishing up final details of the design now, so the rest is really just waiting on various things to be implemented/go through. We’re ideally hoping for April/May 2015 at this point! Speed bumps happen.😉

Let’s make amazing things happen together!